My journey behind the camera started with a tea box..
My very first memory of a "camera" was actually the cutting of a hole in the corner of a Twinings tea box.
I remember running around with the box pressed to my eye, looking through the hole like a viewfinder, and pretending to snap photos. I think I was about 4 years old.
My family was probably your typical 90s household, with disposable cameras capturing most of our memories— so I wasn't exactly a stranger to the camera.
One day, when I was 11, one of my best friends told me I could have her point-and-shoot camera. I'm not even sure it was hers to give away, to be honest, but that camera stayed with me for many years.
And I used it.
I took it to school with me all the time, capturing photo of my friends— and of course, a whole lot of selfies. The result? A folder on my computer that contained an album from each school term that year.
It wasn't fancy at all, but it was the beginning of something bigger.
Years later, it was my older sister, Kylie, with 8 extra years on me, who owned a Canon DSLR. Lucky for me, having a much older sister meant she had nice things that I could borrow!
I was always in front of her camera, the test subject and sit in model when she wanted to try something.
But at around 14, I started to play around with her camera myself, again, taking photos of my friends, jumping onto PicMonkey (which was the hype back then) and edit funky pictures where I'd change their eye colours to some neon pink colour..
Eventually, I graduated to Photoshop, though with all my sisters existing presets which was basically cheating: so I never really learned the ins and outs.
My school didn't offer photography as a subject during my time, so when our art teacher assigned us to build an art portfolio, I decided to do mine with photos instead. That turned into a series of photoshoots with my friends, with a backdrop stand and paper roll and putting my newly learned Photoshop skills to use.
Another point-and-shoot camera, which was a gift for my 16th birthday, came with me everywhere over the years, capturing memories of all the different milestones, including parties and other teenage antics. My personal Facebook page used to have albums upon albums (now locked so no one can see) of our high school parties, where I suppose I was the designated photographer!
At the same time, phone cameras were becoming pretty decent so there was no shortage of photos.
A few years out of high school, having a full-time job meant I could finally afford my own camera.
One day, I impulsively decided it was time to get back into photography. I recall having some pretty big ambitions to start my own business and start making money.
I did my research to see what entry-level camera I could afford, and I went and bought a Canon 750D, which is still with me to this day (though it doesn't come to shoots!)
With much excitement, I took my new camera down to the Hamilton Gardens with me and played around, snapped some photos of some bees on some flowers and what not.
Dragged my friends along on nature walks so I could practice.
But.. I was never really into landscape photography.
And so, I'm ashamed to admit, but the camera got packed away for a couple more years.
That is, until February 2020.
My mum and step dad were getting married, and they asked me to take some photos of the day. That was when I rediscovered my love of photography.
I was in my last year of my Sociology degree, and the dream of having my own business came rushing back to me.
I've always known I wanted to work for myself: ironic given I'd just committed three years to study something I was never going to be self employed for.. I really wanted to build a life that I had control of. I didn't want to go to work a 9-5 where I could only grow so much, or have my creativity limited.
However, I was also incredibly passionate about what I'd learned in Sociology, so I was torn between two dreams-- one where I was a self employed creative.
And the other where I was a policy advisor for restorative justice in NZ.
And so came, The Candid Capturer-- my first business name, with a focus of capturing candid memories for families. I managed to get a few shoots in..
And then.. as we all know, soon after, Covid hit New Zealand, and myself and the rest of the country spent our next few months in isolation and not able to see anyone beyond our own household.
Well.. there goes the plan to be a portrait photographer.
So it was a slow start to my business, but it gave me some time to build my brand. By December, I had graduated with a BSocSc and I had a full-time job secured at the Hamilton District Court.
For the next 2 years, I slowly built my business, photographing whoever and whatever I could. The small amount of money I made was invested back into my business, and my goals shifted as I went.
My direction shifted when a women booked herself in for a shoot, just for herself.
I'd always admired another local photographer's work focusing on female empowerment photography-- but it wasn't until I experienced it for myself that I finally understood.
I walked away from this shoot feeling inspired, connected to my own feminine, and craving to connect with and capture more women in this way.
That's when She by Shan was born.
A new direction with a female-focus. An ode to my tom-boyish self that celebrating the feminine is beautiful.
I can save the tale of this part of journey for another time, because this post is getting long.
I've always been hesitant to try and claim that I have 10+ years experience behind the camera at the age of 28.
But reflecting back on my journey has reminded me that I've been capturing fellow humans for 17 years. That is wild!
I think I'll give myself credit for the time I've spent behind the camera, because it's pretty clear this was always what I was meant to do.
If you made it this far, thanks for reading about my journey and helping me reminisce and rediscover my "why".
Chat soon!
Shan / Personal Branding Photographer
Specialising in empowering personal branding photography for women in business
Giving you the confidence to show up online
